So, it’s been weird…. more on that later.
Today I went to buy some new jeans. I don’t like new clothes or shoes. I’ve never liked them. I feel like a big dork wearing something that doesn’t look worn. But now days… I don’t like spending money on clothes and barely ever do. I can tell that I’m getting older because I’m consciously trying to find my uniform…. all the stuff that reliably fit and reliably last and don’t get the things you wear once hangs in the closet till you decide to give it away. But these jeans were wearing very thin… so thin I wore leggings underneath them because they had holes in the knees. I considered online shopping but, I don’t know what my size is lately so I thought I should go find out. I tried on 20 pairs of jeans and picked the only pair that was tall enough. I stop by to pick up some lunch at a vegetarian place and while I’m waiting for my order, I sit and decide to tie my shoe. Right when I cross my legs, my pants split across the leg in the crotch. Talk about the right time to buy pants. I go to the restroom and change into my new jeans. They came with a belt. 2 birds.
It’s been weird because things are working the way that I know they can. I feel bad, I can snap myself out of it. I feel good… I remember why and savor it. I feel pensive, I write and write and play guitar very passionately. I feel passionate… I sing loud until I fizzle.
I just feel like my environment is in this controlled state and I am ready to go on a trip and shake it up a bit. I told myself to be good and make sure everything is sticking. But maybe I’m no good as velcro and I keep meeting the same side of the magnet. Not sure.